My Sister Is Having A Baby (Right Now)

My sister is having a baby. I started writing this TWO DAYS AGO because she went to the hospital ON MONDAY and we still don’t have  a baby TODAY. Please enjoy my feelings about birth, as told in gif form:

Monday, February 25th:

1:30pm: Tarah is being induced. I had to make my mom stop describing it because ew, gross.

klhoe gross face

5:30pm: Tarah is back at the hospital after being induced. Alex’s stress level: 8/10

sheldon breathing into bag

7:00pm: Tarah’s contractions are regular. Alex’s stress level: 10/10

fainting

7:40pm: No updates yet, but I am going into sporadic tears while watching Castle. (IT WAS AN EMOTIONAL EPISODE AND I AM FRAGILE OK).

oprah crying

8:16pm: Mom gives me updates using graphic medical terms. Gross, mom.

threw up in my mouth

8:31pm: They are sending Tarah home for reasons that make me gag again. More waiting!

kitten sighing

Tuesday, February 26th:

8:00am: Back to the hospital for Tarah. Godspeed my friend!

bye love you dont die

9:00am: I have to go to work, this baby is taking foreeeeeeever.

2:00pm: Home from work. Tarah has been at the hospital all day and nothing is happening. It’s because he’s waiting for his Auntie Alex to come and witness his mother’s Greatest Pain Of All Time. But seriously buddy, hurry it up.

devil wear prada glacial pace

3:00pm: Tarah is officially Rachel from Friends in that episode where everyone in the world has a baby before Rachel. Tarah has witnessed approximately 6 women give birth so far.

3:15pm: Tarah is getting induced AGAIN. Holy crap, this baby business sounds horrible.

birthin babies

4:00pm: Tarah gets to go home for a few hours. I imagine this is how she feels:

everything hurts im dying

8:00pm: Back to the hospital.

hell has to be just like this

9:30pm: Oh sweet mother of pearl, they are sending her home again. WILL THIS HELL NEVER END.

angry head covering

Wednesday, February 27th:

8:00am: Just so you all know, we’re going on DAY THREE of having the baby. Chances of me having children:

harry potter never

 

Overnight Updates: Tarah came back to the hospital at 11:30 at which point her water broke. Yay! Gross! Since then she’s had her epidural and is now resting. For those who appreciate gross body part updates, she’s at 4-5 centimeters.

bravo

 

9:00am: I am off to work. I will give y’all the big update when it comes. Go Tarah!